Learning to Blog

I've always been a writer. When I was very young I would write simple stories with predictable plots and morals. When I was older I would chronicle my life. Those writings usually ended up being deleted permanently from the computer, because they were simply so deep. So into my life. So real. I was afraid of them, because they were so honest.

I wish now that I had kept them. I could have a narration of my life by myself, and see how much I have grown. Things that were huge to me at one point are now silly and inconsequential. Things I thought were insurmountable are now trivial.

I could also see how much I have fallen apart. How far away I have gotten from God. How scary some of my life really was in a spiritual sense. I could see what a shaky, unstable organism I really was. How immature I was. How depraved I had become.

I wish I had chronicled then. I wish I had kept all my old journals and exposed them. So many life lessons can be learned from the scrawling of other human beings as they make their way through life. You can learn so much from what other people have been through.

Especially yourself.

And that is why I'm blogging here. I have longed to have a place to organize all my random thoughts, put the pieces together, see how life fits and flows and moves and loves. And when a good friend of mine got a blog, copycat or not, it was too hard to resist.

This will be my thinking place. The place where I learn from my own mistakes, pick myself up with my own advice. And I hope, in some simple sort of way, that maybe something I've written can help others, too.

I want to learn from this. I want to fit together all the truth that I can, piece my life together, understand it and shape it. I want to learn the simple things, the compelling things, the beautiful things, that I have been learning all my life. I want to learn the essential.

I want to learn to breathe.